First there was the tooth fairy
          And the Easter Bunny.
          Then, of course, Santa before I out grew him too.
          Is this to be a life process
          Of disillusionment in increasing doses?
          Because now they tell me there is a God.

I first read these words in 1975, penned by a 14 year old school girl and submitted to her school magazine, and I have never been able to forget them. In fact, I was about 24 years old at this time, lived all my life as a believer in god and that of course, because of my upbringing. My beliefs at this time in my life were quite confused although I didn't really recognize just how confused until much later. It is clear to me now that this statement of doubt had actually resonated with my own deeply held, but suppressed feelings of doubt.

I now think that I was not quite so shocked by what was said in this verse, but more by the fact that it was being said at all. And in this case, it had been written by someone very young, and that it was being published in a school magazine. My attitudes to matters of faith up until that time were that it was simply inappropriate to register a view that was not in line with current society attitudes to faith in god. It was almost a given that you were a believer and talk like this was condemned as blasphemy, a very serious matter. This now shows the level of indoctrination that I had been exposed to as a child and that it was still with me as I was at this age of being newly married and about to become a father to my own child. I had to consider how I was going to raise my own children, and it was clear that to follow the example given to me by my parents was not a model I wanted to follow at all.

I had always professed a belief, but I never actually felt a conviction. I had seen other people, many highly educated and quite senior to me and who occupied positions of importance and they professed a very strong faith in god. How could it be that they were getting a whole lot more meaning out of this church stuff than I was, even though I had studied it quite a lot.

At the time of reading this verse, I had instantly memorized it, and even shown it to my wife because it had actually managed to challenge me and cause me to, for the first time, really look at my own beliefs and why I held them. It was to later have a much greater impact than I could possibly predict at the time.